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Saturday, January 26, 2008 @ 3:45 AM
Guilt and Fear (Turning 16)
if u guys think that this post is some kinda fake usual emo post, tell u, its not!if u still think its not true and im just try acting emo, so be it....and dont bother to read cos i dun need fucking ass throwing shits in my blog....out! right now, have this mixed feelings over me...not knowing what and how to react....ppl may think that im bad...a bad fren...a bad person...i felt so useless....feel like hiding myself somewhere really far away from the ppl who know me....no one will never understand...no one will wanna understand..and i dont bother to make them understand....keeping it to myself is good enough then letting it out to everyone...cos i noe...when i open up my gap, everything will be at worst...keeping it inside is torturous enough....seems hard fer people to get it...but then...by keeping quiet just make me feel the guilts...fear that surrounds me all over...the fear and guilts that has been haunting me now...sometimes...thinking bout it..i should NOT have this feelings...weird, strange feelings.......well....im a bad person...a bad fren...i hate myself...looking myself in the mirror...how weak my hearts are...how rebellious and selfish i am...hating my reflections..just the same as hating the whole me...pasts have taught me....but naturally...it came back and make the whole me miserable more than ever...to the worst of all...im turning 16 on the 28 January....getting old....getting to the age which ppl say 'turning sweet 16'...sweet????hah! these days....these moments....these situations just spoiled it....SPOILED IT!THEY ruined it AGAIN!can u ppl pls stop hurting me!!!haiz.....Happy Birthday to me....just so u know..i like u now... im sorry....
Death is the ending of life... But is not the ending of relationships... Im Moving On....
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